God's love

I am so amazed by His love for us. He has given us so much and yet I fail to give him half of it back. I want to share my hopes with others. I want people to see what God has done for me and my life.

When I look back on my life, things could have turned out so differently. I could have stayed a bitter person and not trusting God. However, He allowed my heart to be opened and see what He had in store for me. God has brought so mugh love into my heart that I need to share it today. Unfortunately, laryngitis has struck so this is how I will share.

I went from a person who felt like a victim. Always feeling like a victim. Always unsure of my purpose here. Always wanting someone to save me from whatever was going on. I have learned that no human can do this. It is only God that can bring me out of the pit of dispare. He has allowed me to go through so much, which I feel it has allowed me to become a better person.

I am grateful for those who supported me through out all my sinful years of fear and depression. Today I sit here, feeling God's love in me. I may still suffer from satan's attacks, but I know where to go now. I seek God with an open heart and I will be just fine.

Being a true disciple of Jesus is so difficult. No matter what anyone says. You have to live like no other. Put God first. This is not an easy task since we are such a self centered being. God wants us to love him as he loves us. Can you imagine that? He wants us to love HIM.

My trials as a Christian is minimal. I have the freedom of my beliefs. I can pray whenever I want to. I can tell people about God if I want to. I live in a free country where I will not be tortured or killed because I believe in Him. The trials I have gone through in the last 11 years have been nothing compared to others.

God wanted me to be able to share His love with others. So he put me in the circumstances which I can handle and learn from. In my younger days (you know the stupid years before I learned what a true christian is), I was so sinful in so many ways. I always thought that if I were a good person, I would get to heaven. I knew I was missing something. I know that's not the complete truth. People take His word and mix it with what they want. God wants us to get to Him. He wants ALL of us to see his beauty and love. Why can't we all see it?

Not going to answer that question. I know God has a reason for things to be the way it is now. I know that my life is now for His work. He will be number ONE in my life.

Some have asked me about why I'm still married to someone who has different beliefs than me. Well, it's not difficult to understand. Just because Will isn't a true christian, doesn't mean that it won't happen some day. I have faith that God is working on Will's heart, always. I have faith that God will give him a new job where he can be less stressed. I have faith that we will get to see Will's heart change even more. For him to see God's love. To wake up in the morning and see the beautiful day He's given us.

I want so much for my family and friends to see these things. I am unsure how to explain things, but I know that as long as I continue to live for God, HE will win the battle. HE will be seen by more than just a few. People can see God for the truth. For how wonderful he is.

I guess the most important thing to me is that I continue on this journey. I may not have a voice today, physically, but I know that God is still working powerfully in me. He can make the world a better place. But it starts with me.

God has give me so much that I can't even discribe it. I love Will more today than I did when we got married. Sure we have our problems, but I know that God still wants us to be together. That God has big plans for our family. God kept us together for a reason. To all my friends that knew us before... maybe for them to see the truth about God. God can do amazing things in our lives, but we need to allow him to do them.

I just pray that God continues to light my path brightly, so I can see which one He wants me to follow. Bright neon signs would be nice, but I know it's not that simple. So for now I will continue to work on my faith in Him and follow His word.

Matt 22:
36 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
37 Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' [c] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'

This is the truth of Him.